Wednesday, October 12, 2011

Nyjer Morgan is why you watch baseball. (Baseball)

Millions of Americans who were otherwise completely untroubled by the realization that baseball still exists and in fact is being played in several cities, possibly as we speak, were uncomfortably reminded of that by this:


That's Milwaukee Brewer Nyjer (TPlush) Morgan over on the right there, and the photo was taken after Morgan was struck out by Carpenter and then,

...well, let's have apparent sportscaster (?) "The Toast" (?) tell you about it via his high-quality, professional webcast:




A video of that caliber really puts Ray William Johnson in his place, doesn't it?



But "The Toast" and his groundbreaking report raise some serious questions, beyond "Are those guys the worst rappers ever?" Questions like:

Was Nyjer upset that he was struck out by a guy who other pitchers think is putting up a phony attitude out there?

And how is a pitcher's attitude "phony?"

And can a pitcher be a "warrior", as Cardinals Manager Tony LaRussa put it?

And, also, was Nyjer Morgan actually a marketing genius, as he claims now?

Asked about his antics, which included almost flipping off Giants fans, and, of course, Twitter insults like:

Alberta couldn't see Plush if she had her gloves on!!! Wat was she thinking running afta Plush!!! She never been n tha ring!!!
Aimed at Albert [no a] Pujols, Morgan responded:

Honestly, if you look at what I've done for MLB's TV ratings, they should thank me...

People who don't even watch baseball are going to be watching this series because of what Morgan said on the Twitter about Mr. Pujols. Ooh, Morgan dissed Mr. Carpenter.

It's beautiful for baseball. People are going to watch. What's going to happen? What are they going to do? You know ain't nothing going to happen. But people are going to watch just because of what I did and what I said.

"You know ain't nothing going to happen" might be the truest thing ever said about baseball, but Morgan was wrong about one thing: I didn't tune in to see if he'd Tweet during the game or whatever stunts he was planning on; that didn't affect my viewing habits at all.

But reading that the Beast Mode celebration was based on Sully from Monsters, Inc.? That made me want to watch, a little.

Here's some Monsters, Inc. bloopers:




Morgan, by the way, is batting 0.150 in the playoffs, and only averages 0.174 against Carpenter over his career. So if he doesn't pick it up, he may end up being the reason he, and the rest of the Brewers, watch the playoffs from their homes.

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