Wednesday, December 7, 2011
"M is for my gosh he's good' (So They Made a Song About Sports)(Aaron Rodgers Doesn't Like...)
Aaron Rodgers may not like you, but you sure like him: recent developments in the World According to Aaron Rodgers include not just The (Actually He Might Really Be The) Anointed One outpolling everyone but Jesus and Abraham Lincoln but also a surprisingly-honest love song.
First, the Nearly Jesus: In Wisconsin, A-Rodg is more popular than every other person who ever lived excepting only two: Abraham Lincoln, and Jesus. Rodgers got a 90% approval rating -- besting such supposedly popular/good people as Mother Teresa (he beat her by 7 percentage points), George Washington (beat by 4) and Santa Claus, who polled suprisingly low in Wisconsin, getting only a 67% approval rating.
Of course, while people like A-Rodg just fine, the highest-rated person in the poll was... themselves: 93% of the people polled reserved their best praise for themself.
With approvals like that, it's no surprise that some local rockers from La Crosse, Wisconsin, felt compelled to compose a (platonic?) tribute to Rodgers:
I Could Be Your Jordy, by Sleeping Berries Three:
What can I say about that? It's incredible. Even if I didn't know who Aaron Rodgers was, I'd like that song (although if I lived in Wisconsin and didn't know who Aaron Rodgers was, I'd obviously be on life support from some sort of traumatic brain injury, since I live in Madison, where the only things that gets pumped more directly into my frontal lobe than the Packers are the UW Badgers).
Having now pointed out how great Aaron Rodgers is for several consecutive paragraphs, how can I bring him back down to earth? Maybe by pointing out that he's not so popular out in his home state of California, where the LA Times did a poll to find out who should be the NFL MVP this year, and Tebow outpolled Rodgers, according to reports (the LA Times, in doing the poll, made the curious argument that "MVP" means "Most Valuable Player" [true] but not necessarily the best player [?!?]), but that poll can be easily explained by pointing out that Jesus probably helped out Tebow, because even Jesus has to worry about approval ratings and if Rodgers wins league MVP, next year might find Jesus ranked third in Wisconsin.