Friday, July 19, 2013

In The Beginning, 1 (250=1)

In The Beginning (1)

In the beginning, there was no beginning. There was just a continuation of what came before. But it was all mixed up

What happens is this: there is a universe , always and forever. It is swirling around, you see, and the spinning and swirling causes it to spiral to the middle, everything that is, spinning into a whirlpool in the enter, pulled inexorably in and down and down and in, and then out the other side where a new universe is born in the old one, spreading out and slowing down.
Then: You know how when you twist yourself on a swing, and spin free and then begin to spin the other way?

That's the universe!

And so when everything gets crunched down, it all gets mixed together and reborn. Now there are humans. Once they were dragons and unicorns, some of them, others were sea shells or a fern. Next time, maybe they will be ice cream, or pulsars, or pulsars made out of ice cream, maybe intelligent pulsars made of ice cream and able to still somehow paint graffiti on the side of bridges saying how much they love other pulsars made of ice cream, or to mark rocks with the year they graduate.

All the while, they're slowly spinning back to the middle of their universe, to spin into everything else and then tip back out the other side to become something even more fantastical, like maybe next time you'll have wings.
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In 250=1 I write stories that are exactly 250 words long including the title.  Here's a list of all the stories like this I've written.

So it would be easy to think that this story was inspired by the new theory of the universe proposed this week, the one I call the "Does This Universe Make Me Look Fat?" 



(FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER HERE!)

But it wasn't.  Actually, I wrote this story (and a few others) just because I was thinking about how the universe began, myself.  I do that. I think about how the universe began and so I write stories about it.


5 comments:

Pat Dilloway said...

Pretty much any theory for how the universe works is as good as any other. There's no possible way to prove or disprove them since no one could actually be there to observe or measure the event. God, flying spaghetti monster, Stewie Griffin blowing up his time machine...who's to say which one is definitively right or wrong? No one, that's who. So now you should set up a church and file for nonprofit status and wait for the money to start pouring in.

Andrew Leon said...

The universe doesn't exist; it's just a mass hallucination.

Briane P said...

I think they could someday prove how things started. You could also prove whether the universe is expanding or if the red shift in light that says it's expanding is instead caused by increased mass, and relatively simply: just launch two space probes (simple transmitters would do) at the same target, but a year apart. Then see when they get to that target. By launching them at the exact same time only one year apart, you guarantee that they are launched on the same path, because the Earth would have come around to the same spot in its orbit -- but we and the other target would be 1 year further along.

The two targets SHOULD arrive exactly 1 year after each other, if all other variables are the same. If they arrive by times that are different by more than the margin of error the universe is moving in some way.

That would then disprove the Fatter Universe Theory, too -- unless BOTH are true.

Anyway, though, proving that the universe was created from a singularity/the big bang doesn't explain how that happened, and proving that it is a static universe that is expanding doesn't explain where all the fat matter came from originally. The only way to prove THAT would be to meet God, or the FSM, or whoever created the universe.

Because even "In The Beginning 1" doesn't tell how the funneling into a new universe began.

Cosmology is fun! (I think this is cosmology. I don't know. I just wanted to use that word.)

A Beer For The Shower said...

South Park nailed it. In the beginning, we were all retarded baby fish that crawled out of the ocean with mutant fish hands and had buttsex with a squirrel.

http://www.southparkstudios.com/clips/155351/retard-babies-butt-sex

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